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metal: use shared buffers on eGPU (#17866)

• metal: use shared buffers on eGPU

With #15906, I noticed on important regression when using metal backend on eGPU. This commit restore the previous behavior and add an option to force its activation.

• metal: use shared buffers on eGPU

• metal: use shared buffers on eGPU

macOS/iOS:

• macOS Apple Silicon (arm64)
• macOS Intel (x64)
• iOS XCFramework

Linux:

• Ubuntu x64 (CPU)
• Ubuntu x64 (Vulkan)
• Ubuntu s390x (CPU)

Windows:

• Windows x64 (CPU)
• Windows arm64 (CPU)
• Windows x64 (CUDA 12)
• Windows x64 (CUDA 13)
• Windows x64 (Vulkan)
• Windows x64 (SYCL)
• Windows x64 (HIP)

openEuler:

• openEuler x86 (310p)
• openEuler x86 (910b)
• openEuler aarch64 (310p)
• openEuler aarch64 (910b)